So, you think you know Christmas.

Let’s see.

Who wrote White Christmas: Mel Torme, Irving Berlin, Mel Tillis or John Lennon?

Who wrote A Christmas Carol: Mark Twain, Charles Dickens, Agatha Christie or Garrison Keillor?

Of Santa’s eight reindeer, how many of their names start with the letter D?

Now, for the more serious stuff.

Who would Santa like to find under his Christmas tree? Martha Stewart, Oprah, Katie Couric or the Dixie Chicks?

Who would George W like to take a sleigh ride with: Osama bin Laden, the ghost of Saddam, Hillary Clinton or Russian president Vladimir Putin?

What state has a city named Santa Claus: Wyoming, Alaska, Indiana or Minnesota?

What’s Santa’s favorite movie: It’s a Wonderful Life, Miracle on 34th Street, Brokeback Mountain, A Christmas Carol, Fred Claus or Alvin and the Chipmunks?

The weather outside is North Dakota Cold, Minnesota Nice, frightful or delightful?

What were Frosty the snowman’s last words: “Damn sun.” “Meltdown again.” “Winters were a lot colder when I was younger.” Or, “Bring in on, baby, the cold, I mean.”

Where was the traditional Christmas flower Poinsettia first grown? Mexico, Spain, East Texas, Wisconsin or Canada?

Santa’s pick of the Republicans running for president: Mike Huckabee, Rudy G., John McCain, Fred Thompson, Mike Bloomberg or Fargo’s Scott Hennen?

Kris Kringle is sometimes mistaken for: Rush Limbaugh, Karl Rove, Dick Cheney or Donald Rumsfeld?

Rudolph’s favorite Christmas card image: “Santa in a Hum Vee,” “The Beaches of Hawaii,” “Christmas in July,” or “Mary and Joseph Vacationing at a Holiday Inn.”

What department store created Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer: JC Penny, Montgomery Ward, Sears or K-Mart?

Instead of milk and cookies, Santa would like: beer and crackers, Burger King Whopper, Wal-Mart gift card or a subscription to Playboy?

In A Christmas Carol, what song does the caroler sing outside Scrooge’s office? Silent Night, The First Noel, White Christmas, God Rest Ye Merry Gentlemen or The Star Spangled Banner?

Santa’s favorite person in the Lower 48: George Steinbrenner, George W, George Will or George Hamilton?

Santa’s favorite of the Democrats running for the White House: Hillary, Obama, John Edwards or Ed Schultz?

Reasons why you deserve a visit from Santa this year. 1) You take out the garbage, 2) You still vote Republican, 3) You know Mrs. Claus, 4) You won’t tell what Mrs. Claus has told you about Santa.

Reasons why Rudolph is considering taking this Christmas off? Global warming, the traffic, Santa’s so old he can’t see past his nose, or “I’m getting too old for this crap.”

Who was the most popular singer to record White Christmas? Bob Hope, Bing Crosby, Peggy Lee or Gene Autry?

If you answered Irving Berlin, Charles Dickens, Montgomery Ward, God Rest Ye Merry Gentlemen, Mexico, Indiana and Gene Autry to the handful of the serious questions, you deserve a place on Jeopardy.

Merry Christmas.

George Hamilton sends his love.